"From"

All my life I have struggled with this question. My road trip is no exception, but it does make it just that much more complicated. 

"Where are you from?"

Some people are born somewhere, grow up there, work there, raise a family there and voila! That is where they are from. 

What about the folks who don't have such a stable location in life?

Here are some of the key things that I think could work as answers for this question and my answers for them. Maybe you can help me figure out where I'm from.

• Where were you born?  
• Ohio
• Where did you grow up? 
• My family moved around about 10 times growing up. I spent 3rd - 9th grade in Kent, WA so that's the majority of my adolescence, right? If you are wondering why I moved around so much. The answer is probably the same as why you didn't move around much. 
• For this one, most people respond by asking if I was an Army brat. Apparently that is a completely acceptable answer that doesn't require further investigation. The answer is no, but I claim God's Army since my dad was a minister and it confuses people enough to be somewhat accepted.
• Where are your parents from/family heritage? 
• Dad's family is from Pittsburgh PA. Mom was born in Brazil, spent her childhood in Argentina (where her family was from), then moved to England before marrying my dad and moving to the US. 
• Where did you go to high school? 
• Started HS in Tacoma WA (Annie Wright School) and graduated in Austin TX (St Stephen's School)
• Where did you go to college? 
• Started College at Emory University in Atlanta GA and graduated from the University of Texas in Austin.
• Where have you worked as an adult? 
• I worked for 5yrs in Austin TX at the American Cancer Society. Also worked 5yrs at Three Rivers Rowing in Pittsburgh PA. 
• Where is your accent is from? 
• I don't really have an accent - very neutral sounding.
• Where do you own property? 
• No longer own property, but I owned a condo in Austin TX for 7 years. 
• Where is your stuff currently? 
• In a storage unit in Pittsburgh PA. The rest is in my car. I'm homeless through December.
• Where do you work? 
• I am currently working remotely - no home base for work.
• Where your family is? 
• My mother and sister are in Pittsburgh PA. Sister was first to move back about 8yrs ago.
• Where are your friends? 
• My friends are spread out all across the country. My key best friends are in Pittsburgh, Los Angeles, Austin and Dallas.
• Where do you have roots? 
• I feel equally connected to Pittsburgh, Austin & Seattle as I spent pretty much equal time in each of those cities and visit somewhat regularly.

Also, being around my mother I can see her difficulty answering as well as she has an accent. In America, it seems that any given answer isn't accepted until the person asking can make sense of all the parts. 

• When my mother answers people by saying she's American there is always a follow-up question of, "But where are you REALLY from?" since her accent suggest otherwise. 
• Another example is a friend of mine who looks hispanic - if she says she's from Pittsburgh, people ask "But where are you REALLY from?" since her physical appearance might suggest otherwise.

What are people really trying to find out from this question? Maybe they are trying to gauge someone's familiarity with the area they live in, or figure out common connections, to hold someone to some stereotype or expectation based on where they claim home is, or maybe they are curious about something that seems foreign and unusual to them and are trying to make sense of it...etc

The question, "Where are you from" is really not that helpful for any of the deeper reasons someone might ask the question. Here is my challenge: next time these words start coming in to your head, consider analyzing what it is you really want to know and ask a more specific question instead. Maybe something like...

• Do you have any family in the area? 
• What are some of the things you like about living here? 
• Do you feel connected to the local community? How so?
• How long have you lived here? Have you always lived here?
• Did you go to school in the area?
• Do you plan to stay in the area?
• Where else have you lived?
• What is your family heritage? 

I bet the conversation will be much more interesting anyway if you ask more specific questions :) I know I would be much more keen to have this type of conversation. 

Honestly, I'm now just answering the basic question with, "It's complicated."